It’s test day in Beacon Hills. Meaning that every major teen (except the little’un, Liam) is conveniently gathered in one spot for the raging werewolf disease epidemic that’s unleashed inside the school. It seems the assassins are getting bolder and more creative in their attempts to get paid, and that means trouble for the pack.
Scott, Stiles, Malia, and Kira gather at Beacon Hills High to take their PSATs, before which they’re relieved of their phones by Ms. Martin. Nothing could possibly go wrong. It’s quite possibly the worst idea in the world to take away the source of communication for the town’s teen superheroes, but Lydia’s mom still doesn’t know her own daughter is a Banshee (or does she?!) so she’s forgiven.
When Ms. Martin discovers that Coach Finstock and a student both have a grody rash on their bodies, she smartly calls the CDC. What follows is a seemingly random and totally sketchy outbreak within the classroom. While the humans suffer a minor sickness before quickly recovering, the infected werewolves become sicker and sicker until they die. Naturally, Scott, Kira, and Malia all come down with the disease, and lock themselves in the Hale’s vault (which they convince secret-Hale Malia to open, heightening her already suspicious attitude toward them) while the sickly Stiles goes back to try and sleuth out the source of the outbreak.
The culprit is a totally shady test administrator (played by James Urbaniak) who we previously see performing medical experiments on werewolves in a lab. It’s pretty obvious that he’s an assassin, but no one seems to notice his overt creepiness until later, when he attempts to murder Stiles. This mad scientist is by far the most inventive and successful of the assassins, having taken out Alpha Satomi’s pack. But like the other assassins before him, his reign of terror is cut fatally short, this time by Scott’s FBI Agent dad. Nice try, you lunatic.
While the wolves, coyotes, and foxes suffer inside the school, Derek takes Braeden to the hospital where he meets up with Deaton, Melissa, and Alpha Satomi. Derek and Satomi’s reunion is a cute one, with Derek tactlessly informing her that he remembers her by her bad-smelling tea. Which of course turns out to be the antidote. How thoughtful is it of Derek’s mom to leave a jar of it in the vault? Y’know, in case of this really specific emergency.
At the Martin family lake house, Lydia attempts to commune with Meredith’s spirit via record player, only to find an old photo in Meredith’s box of belongings (how did she get a hold of that?) that appears to have been taken in the weird Banshee room. Is Meredith Lydia’s Obi-Wan? Will she be able to guide Lydia from the afterlife? That would be so great.
Scott, Kira, and Malia go temporarily blind, and only barely manage to find the jar of tea and inhale its contents in time. And while the day is saved, Malia discovers that Scott and Stiles have been keeping her true parentage from her and angrily swaggers right on out of there.
“Weaponized” is pretty light on some of the characters, with Lydia’s involvement limited to Banshee shenanigans and hanging out with Sheriff Stilinski outside the quarantine zone. Liam, Chris, and Deputy Parrish don’t even appear. Kira doesn’t do much but be sad and adorable, but it is interesting that the wolf disease affects her differently than Scott and Malia. It has to be a kitsune thing, since foxes aren’t canine [Correction: Yes they are] and Kira isn’t even a were-creature in the first place.
Malia’s character improves the more she’s allowed to be a player in her own storyline. Finding out she’s been lied to is clearly hard for her, and it’ll undoubtedly cause friction in her relationship with Stiles. Stiles has a tendency to coddle Malia, and I think that’s already turning out to be a bad move on his part. Only Malia can know whats best for Malia, and I can’t wait to see her take charge of her own life.
Derek, Deaton,and Melissa get some focus with their interactions with Alpha Satomi. Derek’s interest in Braeden is becoming clearer and clearer, and it doesn’t look like she seems to mind. I’m still somewhat apprehensive about their potential relationship, since it feels like they’ve just been thrown together. Still, unless Braeden is secretly a villain, she’s probably the most positive love interest he’s had. Satomi is, as previously demonstrated, a total badass. She takes out a (completely reckless) assassin with some crazy Matrix moves and comes out of it with nary a scratch. She’s a cool old lady, and I hope she sticks around.
The main theme this season seems to be money, and that continues not just with the multitude of assassins who come at the Beacon Hills gang, but in their own financial problems. Scott and Stiles discuss what they should do with the $500,000 they find and attempt to figure out a plan that totally financially screws Peter with as little collateral damage to Derek as possible. It’s a morally slippery slope, and it kind of reminds me of the old days when Scott and Stiles used to throw Derek under the bus on the regular.
Despite it’s continuing of the Benefactor story line, “Weaponized” feels pretty isolated. Teen Wolf always seems to have an episode of this nature at least once per season (the “Motel California” episode for example), and this did a good job of bringing the suspense that’s par for the course with the episode style. With the assassins showing up in droves, it’ll be interesting to see how the pack decides to proceed.
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